For some, September 20th 2011 has been a historic day. It’s a day that, with the signature of President Obama, thousands are allowed to legally live openly and with total honesty in regards to the life they’re living. The hiding is over. Today marks the end of “don’t ask, don’t tell” in the Military. Early this morning a friend posted the below YouTube video on his Facebook wall.
I will admit that by the end of this video, I was in tears. I sat in my office this morning listening to the fear in this man’s voice as he told his dad for the first time that he’s gay. There was the questioning of “will you love me… period?” Then there was the sound of relief once the burden he had been carrying for years was off his chest. For once he could finally start living in freedom, openness and honesty.
This post isn’t a debate of homosexuality. During the 28 years of my life, one thing has proven true: I live with a fear of man. I am more concerned about what you’ll think of me, if you’ll remain my friend and if your love toward me will continue. I continually sacrifice myself and Christ’s calling and instead settle for a life plagued with insecurity because I am afraid of what others will think of me if I were to live in true honesty. I hide my fears, failures and short comings because at the end of the day I am more concerned about so called “love” from so called “friends” than living a life of brutal honesty, exposing my fears, learning from my failures and overcoming my short comings.
From the my office to the dinner table, the gym to the church, far too many of us live in fear. A friend once told me “fuck what other people think.” While you might disagree with the choice of language, there’s truth in that statement. Get over what others will think, or better yet, what you think others will think. The soldier in the video above was fearful of what he thought his dad’s reaction would be. He was afraid because he thought his dad would be angry and would turn his back on him. Instead he was met with the words, “I still love you. It doesn’t change our relationship.”
Friends, I challenge you to consider the areas of your life that you’re not living in honesty. What are you hiding? What fears cripple you? What’s the one thing that you’re afraid if someone found out, they’d certainly abandon you? We’ve spent far too long submitting our secrets to Post Secret. It’s time to live with honesty. True friends love regardless of sexual preference, struggle or the secrets you’ve held onto for far too long.
From the office to the dinner table, the gym to the church, let’s commit embrace honest living and fight the fear of man.